The 8th March is International Women’s day, and the theme this year is Give to gain. Here is why giving to you is the best way to gain, not just for yourself, but those around you. It’s not just for today either, but everyday. A thing I have heard a lot as a mother is that self care is important. You know the expression you can’t pour from an empty cup? Well at times we do – we have no choice! It can be easy to feel like self-care is one more thing on your to-do list and one other thing to fail at. I promise you this isn’t just another article about self-care, but how you can genuinely give to yourself so that you can gain time and support in the future.
What does give to gain actually mean?
The focus of International women’s day in 2026 is giving to gain. The aim is to continue working towards gender equality through giving. It’s not just a case of giving to charities who support gender equality and empowering women, although this can be what you choose to give. It’s about having your work recognised, calling out gender stereotypes, celebrating women’s successes and educating and sharing knowledge. That may seem like a lot! I get it, so let’s put a little twist on it and look at ways we can give to gain on a personal level.
Give time to friendships
Another quote we hear often as Mothers, is that ‘it takes a village’. This isn’t always as easy as it sounds, and lots of us don’t have these elusive villages. Socialising isn’t easy and friendships are something I have struggled with in adult life. So I really do appreciate how hard it can be. Giving some time to friendships is a great way to gain for yourself though. It’s a great way to try and build your ‘village’ or offer support to someone else’s. Making or supporting friendships with other parents can help build a support network of people who can help with drop offs and pick ups if you get stuck as just one example. Or offer support for when your child seems to be going through yet another phase.
This doesn’t mean you only need Mummy friends though. Friendships with people you have things in common with should also be nurtured. Giving time to these friendships can help you to spend time doing things you enjoy. It helps you keep a part of your identity, which can be lost when you become a parent.
Give praise
How often do you receive praise? It’s something that many of us struggle to accept. But it feels good right? So why not give praise to others? I am guilty of doom scrolling on my phone, as i’m sure many of us are. How often do we scroll past photos where we think, ‘they look nice’ or someone has achieved something they are proud of. Next time instead of giving it a simple heart or a thumbs up, imagine how they would feel if you left a comment. Let’s build up those around us. Those comments may lead to conversations that a heart or a thumbs up doesn’t.
What do you gain from it? Well firstly imagine how nice it feels to make others happy. Kindness breeds kindness – they may go on to share kindness with others. Before you know it, those around you are spreading and sharing praise and kindness wherever they go!
Give opportunities
Can you guess how many of the top 100 companies in the UK have male CEO’s? Let me tell you, the latest published data says it’s 91! It’s unbelievable in this day and age that gender inequality is still so apparent. But it is! Most of us aren’t in a position where we can appoint CEO’s or become CEO’s ourselves, so we need to look for other ways we can support women in business.
Where possible, consider using female led businesses. Try to use smaller businesses if you can rather than continuing to line the pockets of the male CEO’s in these leading companies. Buying from smaller businesses has so many more benefits too, supporting local communities and being more environmentally friendly to name a couple. If you’re needing trades people, consider looking for female ones. Think of other ways you can provide opportunities to women in business.
These small steps can go a way towards reducing gender equality, and demonstrating to our children that gender stereotypes are exactly that, stereotypes.
Give role models
This is one of the most important things we can give as a Mother and as a woman. It is all too easy to ignore inequalities or discrimination, because we don’t want to interfere or for an easy life. Being a role model in advocating for women, shows those being discriminatory that it is simply not acceptable. It also shows others that they should not accept this behaviour, and encourages them to stand up for others they see in similar situations.
This isn’t limited to the Mums of girls either. You can also be a good role model to your sons so that they feel confident in advocating for women when needed. This may increase your own confidence, as well as helping to raise more rounded individuals. I know I am quite conscious of my actions at times when I feel I want to be a good role model, so I feel it keeps me accountable.
Give boundaries
Another thing we are hearing about a lot at the moment as Mothers is ‘The invisible load’. Finally there is more awareness of the additional burden women and mothers face in daily life. Just remember equality isn’t about who does the dishes, but who remembers that the dishes need to be done. Set boundaries at home so that you aren’t the one who needs to be thinking of everything. I know for me, I feel like I am close to feeling total overwhelm the majority of the time. Helping to ease this invisible load would lower my baseline and mean I am actually less likely to get to the point of feeling overwhelmed. So setting boundaries, even for simple things, like my boys filling up their water bottles for bed time takes a little pressure off of me.
If you are a working Mum, remember these boundaries don’t just apply to homelife. We need to set boundaries for ourselves too. I am terrible at checking my emails and teams messages at home on my non-working days. I may not always do something about them at that time. However, this leads to anxiety for me as I know it is something I need to pick up when I’m at work next. Rather than spending a couple of extra days in blissful ignorance. So for me a boundary I set to myself is not to check these!
Give forgiveness
You are human! If you are anything like me, you will never get to the end of the to-do list – and that’s ok. When I had some sessions with a life coach, something she said to me will stick with me forever. Replace ‘Should’ with ‘Could’. For example, for me I may think, I ‘Should’ have gone through the kids clothes to donate the ones they no longer wear. I may have had a really long stressful week, and just wanted to enjoy those few hours to myself. I needed a break. So I would re-word that to: I could have sorted their clothes, but I really needed some downtime to regulate today. If things like this happen, don’t hold it against yourself, give yourself forgiveness. Think what you would say to a friend in a similar situation.
Finally, give to yourself
I promised this wouldn’t be another typical self-care article – and it isn’t. Do take a moment though to think what you can give to yourself. For me self-care isn’t about putting a face mask on and painting my nails. It’s about reading my book with a cup of tea. Giving these moments to yourself is one of the most important things you can give to yourself. Rather than being intimidated by the ideas of self-care we see online, think about what really makes a difference to you. Can it just be 10 minutes a day rather than a weekend spa trip away?
If you want to share what you want to give to gain, then please share in the comments. Happy International Women’s day!
