How to make Mum friends
Ever wondered how to make Mum friends? This article has got you covered. Here we will tell you all about how to make Mum friends, including tips and experiences from real Mums, real lives.
It sounds strange to think of Mums being lonely. They are almost always surrounded by little ones or people. Yet it can be a very lonely time for Mums. It can also be difficult to make friends. Life can be so busy and take over meaning you quite often don’t have the time to make friends. Even talking at a playgroup or park can be tricky!
Benefits to having Mum friends
Other Mums don’t faze easily. They can usually sit through conversations about green poo (while eating pesto pasta salad!). Conversations about childbirth and stitches are carried out over tea. It can be good to have someone to have these open conversations with.
When your children are school age it’s great to have Mum friends you can trust. They can help with drop offs, pick ups etc. They can be a lifesaver at times. Mums are understanding of times you may have to cancel plans at the last minute. They appreciate that sometimes when you have children, things come up, and they don’t hold that against you. They will fully appreciate why you are nearly always running late!
It’s great to have someone to share things with. Ran out of nappies on a day out? You can guarantee one of your Mum friends will have one. You can also do toy swaps or clothes their little ones have outgrown. Mum friends are also great for offering advice and support. It can really help knowing you are not alone and there are others experiencing something similar.
Disadvantages of having Mum friends
Mum friends aren’t always a good thing. There can be a lot of competition between Mums. Who breastfed longest, who’s baby walked first? This competitiveness can be intimidating. Every child is individual and there is no need to make comparisons.
As much as Mum friends can give great advice, they can also give unwanted advice too. Sometimes this advice can come from a place of kindness, but be wary of when it feels like it isn’t. Parents will have differing opinions on how to raise their children. Their way may not be the right way for you and your child.
Tips on how to make Mum friends
- Get out and about. If you have little ones, consider attending playgroups. There are many about, including free ones at local churches. These can be great places to meet Mum friends with children of a similar age to your own. If you get on well with someone, be sure to talk to them the next time you see them. Perhaps arrange to meet them outside of the group. Mum and baby exercise classes can also be a great way to meet new mum friends while doing something good for you!
- Get online. Making conversation face to face can be daunting. Meeting Mum friends online can seem a lot easier. There are groups on Facebook to help meet others, as well as apps such as Peanut. This way you can get to chat without the awkwardness that can sometimes be there. Build up your ‘village’ by using online resources and channels as support.
- Don’t be afraid to make the first move. Smile at other Mums and strike up conversation. Even if it doesn’t lead to friendship it pays to be friendly. Remember how intimidating it can be attending somewhere new for the first time. Be friendly to others to make them feel at ease.
- If your children are at school, chat to the Mums at the gates. Scope the Mums out first of all to see which ones you are more likely to make mum friends with.
- Reach out. If your children are older you aren’t likely to be taking them to school. Perhaps try reaching out to friends you may have lost contact with from before, especially those with children of a similar age.
- Branch out! Mum friends are great to have for many reasons. Sometimes though, you need to do something for yourself. It can be nice to have friends with similar interests. Having children the same age isn’t always enough. Join a class, invest time in a hobby and meet new friends that way.
Final words on how to make Mum friends
Be patient when making Mum friends, true friendships can take time. As with many relationships, some will fizzle out. Others will stand the test of time, and these are the ones you want to concentrate on. Being a Mum is busy, finding the time for everything can be difficult. Make sure you invest the times on your friendships, as they are a great support service for you.
FAQ’s for how to make Mum friends
What if I’m shy and find it hard to approach other mothers?
It’s perfectly normal to feel shy. Start small by making casual comments about your children or the current situation. As you become more comfortable, you can initiate deeper conversations.
What if my potential mum friends have different parenting styles than I do? Differences in parenting styles are common. Embrace these distinctions as opportunities to learn from each other. Respect their choices and focus on the common ground of motherhood. Remember, you know what is best for your children.
How can I balance my busy schedule with maintaining these friendships? Prioritise your mum friendships just like you do any other important relationships. Schedule regular catch-ups, even if they’re brief. Remember that understanding and empathy can help maintain meaningful connections.
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